I am willing to feel and own my truth

“God is all the love of all the lovers who have ever loved,” Paramahansa Yogananda

I sit and wonder what to write about. I ask my heart-center what my soul wants to say. I look out through the window of the coffee shop and behold the swaying pine needles being caressed by the sun and the wind. Sparkles of light penetrate my optic nerves and rouses my curiosity. My heart swells like pulsing waves of the ocean pushing onto the shore.

I am hard-wired to life. I am intrinsically one on an energetic level with all the love, of all the lovers, who have ever loved. I am one with Supreme Universal Intelligence.

Love is beyond religion, beyond stories, beyond time, beyond name.

I am the love that exists before and after all my thoughts and stories arise and disappear. I am the pine needle feeling the warm, sweet caresses of the brilliant sun and the gentle swaying power of the wind.

I am the drop in the ocean of love within me. The ocean is alive in my chest, my fingertips, my bones.

These thoughts, these truths, I seek entry into the kingdom of emotional intelligence in my heart. It is one thing to sit in the tree house of my conscious thinking brain and ponder the swirlings and intricacies of the universe, and delight in the intellectual snacking of ideas. It is quite another to get out of my tree house and climb down the ladder of surrender, and sit on the moist, rich soil of my heart. It is in the heart that I seek to know, to embody, what my brain simply loves to just think about.

Just thinking upon truths only keeps them distant from me. Am I willing to make them real in my body? (Eeeek… honestly, this scares me, but I am willing…)

Dropping truths into my chest, feeling them, living them — embodying them in the messy forest of my emotions and relationships — that is where the real work is.

Am I willing to feel on a visceral level the truth of that which I intellectually ponder?

Not so simple.

Not so easy.

But may I ever stay willing.



Photo credit: Javier Allegue Barros via Unsplash

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